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  • Post Date Wednesday, December 22, 2010

    Fight!


    So, you saw this lawsuit, right? I feel like at least one of the people whose name appears in the complaint has diligently studied this article of mine.

    I'm no lawyer, but it looks like the people who are in the deepest 'ish' are West and Zampella, if Activision turns out to be able to prove any of this. And I am told little off-the-record anecdotes by people who would know that seem to suggest that the behavior on their part -- specifically as concerns being difficult to Activision and Treyarch -- is at least plausible.

    I have seen Jason West in person only once in my life; it was at Bungie's Halo Reach booth, where he was shuttling in to see a private demo.

    But, you know, I don't know. Numerous lines in these legal documents are redacted, primarily to protect EA, according to the notes on them, but Activision is promising to try to get that information unsealed. Surely all of the facts remain to be determined by a court. It's unseemly for a member of the press to armchair-speculate. But you guys can do that all you want!

    ANYWAY. Tension between Activision and EA has been brewing for some time and becomes increasingly uglier. This is the ugliest yet. So! It's time to choose your sides. Who is the evillest empire?!

    Renowned academic, designer and satirist Ian Bogost, of Cow Clicker fame, is offering Facebook users the opportunity to show, via bovine demonstration, which side you support in this battle royale. Do you work best in an environment of "pessimism and fear", or do you like "a mean BBQ"? Which of these two execs really got the horns put on him when West and Zampella Respawned?

    "Today we settle disputes in the courtroom or the boardroom," said Bogost, speaking exclusively to SVGL. "But in different times men clicked to the death to resolve their differences. Thanks to the power of the Web, once again we can let the people decide! Click your cow to victory! Click it for democracy and truth and justice! Click!"

    Play Cow Clicker, pick either Bobby Kowtick or John Riccowtiello and show your support. On Facebook. Which is about being social and sharing your feelings on things, right?

    PS: Cow Clicker was named one of 2010's top 10 Cult Hits on today's Gamasutra top five by GD Mag editor Brandon Sheffield.

    PPS: This cowfight may or may not have been my idea

    Year in Review: Honorable mentions

    All this week, we'll be recapping the year that was. Today: 2010 honorable mentions.

    Rough as this year was, there were still plenty of games that I played and enjoyed, even if they didn't end up making my list of the best games of the year. In chronological order of when I played them:

    Battlefield: Bad Company 2: I don't think I ever wrote about this game. I am generally tired of military-themed shooters, but I dug the big maps and the vehicles, and I want to apologize to the dozens of teammates I inadvertently murdered whenever I was driving.

    Alan Wake: A terrific-looking shooter with a decent gameplay gimmick and a nice sense of pacing. If only this bestselling author hadn't been such a terrible writer.

    Super Mario Galaxy 2: Even if I find myself reaching the "it's not you, it's me" stage with a lot of these Nintendo games, the quality is undeniable. You still can't screw with Super Mario.

    Hydro Thunder Hurricane: A super-fun throwback arcade racer for Xbox Live Arcade. I really, really liked this game. It almost made my top 10 for the year.

    Metroid: Other M: Uneven, especially where the storytelling was concerned, but Other M was a fun and fast-paced update to the Metroid universe. I just wish it hadn't gotten better after it ended!

    NBA Jam: I almost forgot it existed, but I had fun with this game while it lasted. God, is that the most mild praise you can imagine, or what?

    Mario vs. Donkey Kong: Mini-Land Mayhem!: My first review for Joystiq was also my biggest surprise of the year. This game's reach doesn't exceed its grasp; it accomplishes everything it sets out to do.

    Donkey Kong Country Returns: Rock-solid 2d platforming marred only by -- what else? -- shoehorned waggle control. Apparently there's a classic controller mode available, which probably would have helped to know when I was playing it.

    Majin and the Forsaken Kingdom: Another surprise. I predict that, a year from now, one of two things will happen: either you'll be able to get this game for five bucks from every bargain bin in the country, or you'll have to get it for a hundred on eBay. Both outcomes seem equally likely.

    Mass Effect 2: All right, you bastards. You win. I like Mass Effect 2. Sure, I still find the moment-to-moment play excruciating, just trying to accomplish the simplest tasks, and the plot isn't that good. I've pretty much lost track of the whole thing at this point. The non-stop recitation of alien races and planets is stupefying. And, come on: The Illusive Man? Seriously? WTF kind of lazy storytelling is that? He smokes so mysteriously! And where the hell is he? Is there a bathroom on his solar observation deck?

    But, on the other hand, my renegade FemShep is awesome. I like her dark humor and her clear-eyed take on things. She doesn't do the things I would do in her position, but neither do I feel like the game is forcing my hand. I'm trying to get inside this character's head. There are times when it seems like this is exactly what a roleplaying game is supposed to be.

    Now let's never speak of this again.

    Some Games I Wish I Had Played: Split/Second, Blur, Metro 2033, Joe Danger, Assassin's Creed: Brotherhood, Pac Man CE DX

    Can't win 'em all.

    Tomorrow: the worst games of 2010.

    Post Date Monday, December 20, 2010

    Year in Review: The best of the blog

    Above: Actually the best of Insult Swordfighting.

    All this week, we'll be recapping the year that was. First up: the best of Insult Swordfighting, 2010.

    It's been a strange year. My output was lower than usual. I spent a couple of months without playing anything at all. When I did play games, I often felt uninspired, or even gloomy. Without making things weird between us, I'll just say that a lot happened this year, personally and professionally, that made me question the role of video games in my life. But it's all good. As we head into 2011, I'm excited about the way things are going, and I'm looking forward to playing and writing a lot more.

    Without further ado, here are some of the better Insult Swordfighting posts you may have missed from 2010:

    January: Bayonetta. How is it possible for one game to be so awesome, yet so embarrassing?

    February: I returned from the disabled list. If you're wondering, I have made nearly a full recovery. The doctor and my occupational therapist both told me that it's extremely rare for people to heal so well from this type of injury.

    March: I made the first of many impassioned defenses of Heavy Rain. And I spent way too much time writing about PAX East. Speaking of which, I still haven't gotten my pass for the next one.

    April: I was about to vanish from blogging for awhile. One reason was Peggle.

    May: N/A

    June: What's with the collectibles in Alan Wake? Plus, my banned review of Splinter Cell: Conviction finally saw daylight.

    July: I think a lot of people thought I was trying to stick it to Ebert, but actually this post was about how much I disliked Limbo, and the critical conversation surrounding it.

    August: Seriously, I didn't like Limbo.

    September: Why did Metroid: Other M wait until after the closing credits to get good?

    October: 1001 Video Games You Must Play Before You Die is released, becomes a runaway bestseller, and revenue from its sales through my Amazon Associates account makes me an instant millionaire.

    November: "The Year in Swooning" is always fun.

    December: My vendetta against BioWare knows no bounds. (In the interest of full disclosure, I should mention that I stayed up until 4:30 AM on Sunday playing Mass Effect 2.)

    Tomorrow: Year-end superlatives.

    Post Date Monday, December 13, 2010

    Jack Keane

    Jack Keane

    Jack Keane
    • Publisher: 10tacle Studios
    • Developer: Deck 13
    • Release Date: April 15, 2008
    • Genre: Adventure
    About This Game

    Jack Keane is an amusing, action-packed Point 'n' Click Adventure with loads of allusions to well-known computer games and classic movies. Players assume the role of daring adventurer Jack and accompany him in his travels during the early colonial era. Once again short on cash, no sooner does Jack accept a relatively innocent assignment than he's up against a truly mad scientist and his army of trained apes. The game takes Jack to settings such as London, Capetown and the jungles of India - and he wouldn't be Jack if he didn't run into shifty characters wherever he goes...
    Minimum System Requirements

    • OS: Windows XP/Vista
    • Processor: Pentium 4 @ 2 GHz/ AMD Athlon 2.4 GHz
    • Memory: 512 MB
    • Hard Drive: 1.5 GB Free
    • Video Memory: 128 MB
    • Sound Card: DirectX Compatible
    • DirectX: 9.0c
    • Keyboard & Mouse
    • DVD Rom Drive
    Recommended System Requirements

    • OS: Windows XP/Vista
    • Processor: Pentium 4 @ 3 GHz or Athlon Equivalent
    • Memory: 1 GB
    • Hard Drive: 1.5 GB Free
    • Video Memory: 256 MB
    • Sound Card: DirectX Compatible
    • DirectX: 9.0c
    • Keyboard & Mouse
    • DVD Rom Drive


    PART I
    http://rapidshare.com/files/116465084/Jack.Keanekissme1.part1.rar

    PART II
    http://rapidshare.com/files/116466067/Jack.Keanekissme1.part2.rar

    PART III
    http://rapidshare.com/files/116470075/Jack.Keanekissme1.part3.rar

    PART IV
    http://rapidshare.com/files/116470825/Jack.Keanekissme1.part4.rar

    PART V
    http://rapidshare.com/files/116475024/Jack.Keanekissme1.part5.rar

    PART VI
    http://rapidshare.com/files/116475777/Jack.Keanekissme1.part6.rar

    Jack Keane

    Jack Keane

    Jack Keane
    • Publisher: 10tacle Studios
    • Developer: Deck 13
    • Release Date: April 15, 2008
    • Genre: Adventure
    About This Game

    Jack Keane is an amusing, action-packed Point 'n' Click Adventure with loads of allusions to well-known computer games and classic movies. Players assume the role of daring adventurer Jack and accompany him in his travels during the early colonial era. Once again short on cash, no sooner does Jack accept a relatively innocent assignment than he's up against a truly mad scientist and his army of trained apes. The game takes Jack to settings such as London, Capetown and the jungles of India - and he wouldn't be Jack if he didn't run into shifty characters wherever he goes...
    Minimum System Requirements

    • OS: Windows XP/Vista
    • Processor: Pentium 4 @ 2 GHz/ AMD Athlon 2.4 GHz
    • Memory: 512 MB
    • Hard Drive: 1.5 GB Free
    • Video Memory: 128 MB
    • Sound Card: DirectX Compatible
    • DirectX: 9.0c
    • Keyboard & Mouse
    • DVD Rom Drive
    Recommended System Requirements

    • OS: Windows XP/Vista
    • Processor: Pentium 4 @ 3 GHz or Athlon Equivalent
    • Memory: 1 GB
    • Hard Drive: 1.5 GB Free
    • Video Memory: 256 MB
    • Sound Card: DirectX Compatible
    • DirectX: 9.0c
    • Keyboard & Mouse
    • DVD Rom Drive


    PART I
    http://rapidshare.com/files/116465084/Jack.Keanekissme1.part1.rar

    PART II
    http://rapidshare.com/files/116466067/Jack.Keanekissme1.part2.rar

    PART III
    http://rapidshare.com/files/116470075/Jack.Keanekissme1.part3.rar

    PART IV
    http://rapidshare.com/files/116470825/Jack.Keanekissme1.part4.rar

    PART V
    http://rapidshare.com/files/116475024/Jack.Keanekissme1.part5.rar

    PART VI
    http://rapidshare.com/files/116475777/Jack.Keanekissme1.part6.rar